Slag-bag couture?
Guns and hoes
A gangster themed birthday party doesn’t really conjure up pornographic imagery does it? Blazers, hats, braces, shirts, maybe a fake gun or two. Oh, and hold-ups, bras popping out of shirts and obscenely short-shorts. Really. Welcome to the world of slag-bag couture, where dressing up is code for not really getting dressed at all…
My own experience of this craze began at my friend’s aforementioned ‘gangster’ themed birthday party at Aston University. Now, my own ideas of what to wear were very much more conservative than those suggested to me by her. Perhaps a white shirt with braces? No, lace hold-ups and black hot pants. Can I wear a hat? Yes, but the lingerie is non-negotiable if you want to fit in. When she told me what her and housemates would be wearing I was more than a little worried. Whilst I’m certainly no prude and am not afraid to ‘dare to bare’ a little flesh from time to time, this was just downright obscene.
All fur coat/and no knickers
So, having spent a horrific please-don’t-judge-me 30 minutes or so wandering around Ann Summers in order to find the suitable attire, I left ever ready to try and look the part. Unfortunately, when I got back to my flat and showed my housemates what I had bought, I had been entirely justified in my fear of the sales-assistants giving me funny looks. I shan’t disclose here the pornographic underwear I now own (ENTIRELY BY ACCIDENT), but safe to say I am never going back to that shop again, and the mind boggles at what men find attractive. (My friend’s boyfriend however was adamant that it would mean I would never be left without male interest). Hmm…
Well, when it came to the night I was fully prepared (and ready to down an entire bottle of wine before stepping out in Birmingham). My mother has never looked so disappointed in her entire life. “Oh Bec, you’re not going out like that are you?!” she gasped when I came down stairs. She even made me put a dress and coat on over what I was wearing before she’d let me leave the house! Other people’s reactions however were quite different…it was a very cheap evening is all I shall say.
A bit nippley
When I returned to Durham it got me thinking; things aren’t so different up here in a supposedly more ‘refined’ university crowd. ‘Fancy dress’ seems to translate to ‘Girls, dress like a slag’. At the Collingwood Winter Solstice a whole array of slut-tastic, boob-popping, knicker-hugging coverings of fabric were adorned, passing as … well I’m not entirely sure. One girl was definitely just wearing underwear. Gone are the days when fancy dress actually meant wearing silly clothes for a laugh with your friends. Now it’s all about sex. Even the boys are doing it – shamelessly getting out those beautiful, toned torsos to dress as half-naked men…supposedly ‘cave men’ and the like. Although to be honest I’m not really complaining…It’s actually quite nice. (Yes I am 100% a hypocrite.)
Get your tits out for the lads?
But it’s more than just that. Slag-bag couture is spreading outside the usual fancy-dress circles. In fact, the previous week I had been at a formal and was shocked by the amount of tits that were just, well, everywhere. Big, small, tanned, sagging… just plain everywhere! It even got to the point where my friends and I would mouth ‘BOOBS’ at each other in shock at the extent of some ‘lady’s’ cleavage. I am truly all for believing in flaunting what you’ve got and girls looking hot, but seriously, is it entirely necessary in sub-Arctic climates to use such a cheap ploy for a bit of male attention? Because unlike other female fashions that are mainly targeted at other girls this one is certainly not aimed at anything other than some cheap ogling and perhaps a cheeky fondle when everyone’s a bit pissed and getting over-friendly.
Girls I ask you this: do you really want the guys that are staring at your tits to get anywhere near your knickers? Because in my experience, they’re not really the most attractive male specimens Durham has to offer are they?
A great article that addresses the finer achievements of female liberation.
Now you can show off your tits, get ridiculously pissed, throw up in front of all your friends and flash your knickers in a ditch without fear of oppression or inequality. How far you’ve come! Hurrah!
I think she’s right, it is ridiculous the amount of BOOBS that are everywhere, and the same I’m a girl and have gone out dressed as a school girl or the likes on the odd occassion but seriously we need to tone it down sometimes!
and previous comment, we’re not all the same. thanks.
I’m glad there’s an article about this to bring it to my attention now. Hasn’t been happening over the past 20 years or anything…
Elegance.
Something i feel is really lacking in our current culture.
Dress like a slut, get treated like a slut.
Dress more elegant and your more likely to be treated with respect.
But…
Each to there own i guess. In the end its your choice ladies. Your choice. You’re the one who lives with the consequences.
G,
Was that ironic/satirical or are you just a cunt?
Why does someone showing their boobs make them a slut? I don’t show a lot of boob (because there ain’t much to show) but I don’t assume that girls who do want to shag everyone. Maybe it’s because if you show a lot of boob people think will think you’re a slut? In that case, I think it’s the people who make these rather superficial judgements that need to change, and not the girls.
Isn’t that the problem in Durham generally? Everyone dresses a ‘certain way’ and then gets offended when they are treated accordingly. Girls, if you wanted to be treated like the intellectual, interesting people that you actually are, then act like it. Men are simple, so don’t try n confuse us with tits. If you don’t wanna be judged by them, put em away.
… because men aren’t responsible for the way they treat women? Baloney.
http://uk.geocities.com/ukcelebpics3/c/carol_vorderman_19.jpg
Carol Vorderman… now there’s a woman who can show us her boobs and command an intellectual respect.
Maybe women who want to be treated like intelligent individuals and show off their boobs need a set of numbered tiles, a white board and a random number generator.
I don’t think “showing a bit of boob” stops women appearing intelligent, it can just be distracting for the person they’re talking to. Because breasts are wondrous gravity defying objects. And I have them. Wow. Constantly fascinated…
That’s it, I’m getting a number generator.
All I got was bla bla bla equality bla bla bla . . . boobs, do us
a favor girls, if you want us guys to listen to anything you
have to say and have a vague chance of remembering it make
sure there are no boobs anywhere to distract our simple
minds! (.)(.) = :D
It is of course possible to wear post-feminist under garments whilst discussing the impact of deconstructional philosphy on Islamic thought or to maybe wed better watch Emmerdale instead ..Hmmm
just an intellectual tease like your draws dear have fun
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